Health Updates

Every Friday I’m going to therapy. I still cry at the thought of the abortion. I still cry thinking about how I….broke…. in the past three months. I still cry. But I can rationally think about things now. About my dysfunctional marriage. About my lack of friends. About my disappointing job. About life. I am getting better. And I love Fridays because of how they help.

My next OB-GYN doc visit won’t be for another 3 months. 3 months. It seems like an eternity. I can’t use IUDs anymore (as my body has a great track record so far for rejecting them). And I’m not on birth control. To be honest, I can’t decide what I want to do on that front. I’m not having sex at the moment, so it’s not an issue. And because I just got my period? For the first time I actually feel normal.

I’ve rejoined Weight Watchers to find some sort of…normalcy… in my life. I’ve maintained my weight loss (33 lb. down) and am still a Lifetime Member. I’ve been able to stay after meetings and help answer questions to the newer folks. It’s really nice.

So what does this all mean?

Not sure. Life just sort of turned itself upside down, and it’s only now starting to get upright. And in the mean time, watching friends come in and out of my life who can’t deal with the pressure and uncertainty. Who want to support me. Who just aren’t sure anymore. Is hard. But not as hard as the past few months have been.

I’m getting better.

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~ by shespeakstruth on January 21, 2013.